Hey you,
Just because I once licked a salt lick AND ENJOYED IT, doesn’t mean that Salted Watermelon is a stupid snack idea. Lots of people on the internet are doing it and that’s how I determine if things are appropriate or not. Also, its really easy (life criteria number two) to make.
Hey you,
Your mother is a terrible cook. I’m gonna fix you some meatloaf to make up for your childhood of boiled meat and mushy peas. Eat your feelings, my sweet.
Hey you,
I’ve got 99 problems, but having too much money is NOT one of them. Therefore, let’s buy the cheapest meat at the store that isn’t an organ AKA Fast-Fry Pork Loin Chops. They are pretty terrible unless you cook them right. We are going to focus on adding flavour and moisture to an unglamorous cut of pork.
Hey you,
Let’s get some beef all up in here. Now keeping things gluten-free, I would like my burger served on a lettuce leaf, while you can go ahead and eat yours on a bun. Let’s begin.
Hey you,
If steak is like Christmas morning, Horseradish Chive Cream Sauce is the stocking stuffers. It’s not what you initially are looking forward to, but when your presents are all pyjamas and dictionaries the stockings become the best part.
Hey you,
If you teach a man to fish, he’ll drink a lot of beers and fall asleep as soon as he gets home. If you teach a man to cook, he’ll get all the ladies and make himself supper. So, I’m gonna keep teaching you how to cook – tonight, we are doing Scalloped Potatoes because you love them super-much. Get out the food processer to make this easy on yo’self.
Hey you,
Watching you pillage a town’s worth of double-fudge swirl ice cream post-workout really makes me hate my life. I’ll settle for some gluten-free cookies, and I’ll pretend these aren’t really delicious so that you’ll make me more treats soon.
Hey you,
Thanks for cooking supper tonight. Not only are you in peak physical condition, you make a mean slow cooked roast. Incase you get amnesia, I’m gonna write this simple recipe down.
Boyfriend, Go Cook. 